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How to find happiness throughout your life: 6 tips

May 23, 2023 - 16 min read

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What is happiness?

Where does happiness come from?

Why is it so hard to be happy?

How to find happiness: 6 methods

7 tips to help you achieve happiness

Let yourself feel happy

We all want to know how to find happiness. Whether you’re a recent college graduate or running a company, you’ve probably been looking for the answer to that question for a long time. 

Unfortunately, sometimes your life’s responsibilities can keep you distracted from finding an answer. A demanding job, difficult coworkers, and confusion about your purpose in life are just a few examples of things that can get in the way. No matter how busy you are, though, you deserve to find happiness.

Imagine how it would feel to wake up each day, calm and excited to take on your day. You’d love your job, be filled with a sense of purpose, and have plenty of time to spend with friends and family. No matter how happiness looks and feels to you, we’re here to help you find your way to it. 

Let’s dive into the keys to being happy and how can you start finding happiness within yourself.

What is happiness?

Happiness is the feeling that washes over you when you experience positive emotions, interactions, or events. The brain responds to positive stimuli by releasing feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins, sometimes known as happy hormones.

Certain activities trigger your brain to release these hormones, like exercise, dancing, and meditation. But that boost of feel-good chemicals is situational, and it might go away when you stop that activity or leave a situation that makes you happy. 

For example, runners typically experience a “high” after an intense run, resulting in a euphoric sensation that can last a few minutes to several hours. Similarly, taking risks stimulates the amygdala, a part of the brain that releases a combination of adrenaline and endorphins when it perceives that the body is in danger

But that temporary rush of happy hormones doesn’t lead to a happier life. Life satisfaction is about more than exercise and taking risks. It’s about bettering yourself long-term, discovering what you’re good at, and protecting your energy.

Healthy daily habits like eating a balanced diet and keeping a consistent sleep schedule are simple ways to improve your overall subjective well-being. But there are other factors that you have less control over, like your daily interactions, interpersonal relationships, and work-life balance, which are all subjective.

The good news is there's always room to adjust your habits and foster a positive mental attitude to welcome more joy into your life.

Where does happiness come from?

Happiness doesn’t come from one place, particularly because people are so different. If you ask the people around you what makes them happy, you'll likely hear a lot of different answers. 

One might respond that finding happiness means landing a prestigious job or getting a promotion. Another may define it as having lots of free time to spend on their hobbies. Someone else might argue that winning the lottery would make them the happiest person in the world. 

But happiness goes beyond material goods. In fact, small day-to-day experiences and gestures are most likely to make you happy. 

A study by researchers at the University of Massachusetts and Northwestern University tested out what makes people happy and how much material wealth impacts overall happiness

They polled two very different participant groups: lottery winners and survivors of accidents. Each group was asked how much joy they received from everyday activities: a conversation with a friend or loved one, a good meal, and receiving a compliment. The lottery winners reported lower happiness levels than the survivors.

The research suggests that rather than extreme material success, happiness appears in smaller, mundane moments — as long as you practice gratitude toward them. Although happiness can come from almost anywhere, focusing on the mundane joys you already experience can help you feel better.

Woman-enjoying-spring-how-to-find-happiness

Why is it so hard to be happy?

If you’re experiencing a rough patch or emotional distress, happiness might seem far away, and that’s okay. Nobody can be happy all the time. In fact, according to the 2023 World Happiness Report, happiness levels in the U.S. are falling slightly every year.

Many people associate happiness with achievements: switching careers, meeting a life partner, or making a big purchase. And it’s true that setting goals, working hard to make them happen, and successfully achieving them can contribute positively to your well-being. But happiness should be a side effect, not a goal. 

One reason why it’s so hard to be happy is that happiness is a mindset, and it takes work to find. You might be looking for a one-size-fits-all answer, but living a happy life is more complex than that. Working to find the things that bring you joy — and incorporating them into your life — is the first step.

How to find happiness: 6 methods

There are no quick fixes to enjoying a stronger overall sense of satisfaction, but good habits can set you on the right path. Here are six ways to increase your happiness: 

1. Take care of yourself

Chances are that many people depend on you: children, partners, parents, friends, and colleagues. This isn’t a bad thing, but it’s easy to become so distracted by taking care of others that you forget to take care of yourself

Learn how to prioritize your physical and mental health and develop a self-care routine. Dedicating even a few small moments to yourself every day can give you space to breathe and improve your well-being. 

Incorporate a few universal healthy choices into your daily life, like regular exercise, a nutritious diet, and sleep hygiene. But other habits can — and should — be subjective and unique to you. Explore what makes you feel like the best version of yourself

Here are a few examples of habits and activities to try:

  • Meditating
  • Doing yoga
  • Completing a skincare routine
  • Walking
  • Mindful breathing
  • Being creative

Man-smiling-in-new-home-how-to-find-happiness

2. Find hobbies that bring you joy

Try making time each day for extracurricular activities you enjoy. People who dedicate roughly two hours a day to free time activities experience higher overall well-being than people with less time for themselves. Two hours isn’t feasible for everyone, but even just a few minutes is a good place to start.

Spend your free time on activities that you know are sources of happiness in your life. And if you aren’t sure what makes you happy yet, try new things. Making a new recipe, reading a book on a topic you like, and spending quality time with someone you love are all great options to start.

3. Practice mindfulness

Negative thoughts can affect your mood, both on a day-to-day basis and in the long term. If you find yourself ruminating over negative emotions or have a hard time letting go, try being more present. Mindfulness activities can help you live in the moment and appreciate the things you have rather than regret things you’ve done. 

Mindfulness requires you to focus on what is immediately around you — sounds, smells, thoughts, and emotions — with curiosity and acceptance. Studies have found that people with higher levels of mindfulness also have higher levels of happiness and fewer symptoms of depression and anxiety

4. Write your feelings down

You might feel happy or sad without understanding why, and learning the reasons behind your feelings can help you better control them. Starting a journaling practice is one way to get in touch with your emotions and learn more about your feelings, fears, and needs.

There are several ways to journal with happiness in mind. Gratitude journaling is about reflecting on the things you’re grateful for, like the care of a partner or a smile from a stranger, while anxiety journaling can help you work through negative feelings and discover what makes you feel better.

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5. Give back to others

One way to bring more joy to your life is to spread it to others. Generosity directly impacts happiness on a neural level, and altruism and acts of kindness can bring positive interpersonal relationships into your life. 

When you give back to your community, you may develop a more sympathetic understanding of others, find purpose, and feel connected to the people around you. Try volunteering for an organization you care about or helping a friend with an issue they’ve been having. Their gratitude alone can make you happier.

6. Set goals for growth

Goal-setting stimulates a personal growth mindset and gives you concrete steps to improving your overall well-being. Even small goals, like finishing a book or going for a walk every day, can give you a sense of accomplishment and encourage you to dream bigger for your own happiness.

The way you approach goals is important, too. Mistakes happen, and approaching them with positivity rather than negative self-talk can improve your experience and better prepare you for the next try.

7 tips to help you achieve happiness

We all have bad days at work and at home. Nobody’s immune to a difficult coworker, a disagreement with a family member, or disappointing news. But a positive mindset can help you push through even the cloudiest of days. That doesn’t mean you have to be happy all the time. It’s about moving forward with a positive attitude.

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To send you on your way, here are seven final tips to help you live a life with more joy: 

  1. Celebrate: Recognize your achievements with pride, even ones that seem small. 

  2. Rest: Prioritize good sleep and regular rest for your body to wake up feeling refreshed and ready to get to your day.

  3. Declutter: Analyze your life and avoid or adjust the things that don’t make you happy. This could be anything from redecorating your office space or ending relationships with toxic people

  4. Maintain your values: Pay attention to your worldview and personal values, and let them guide your behavior.

  5. Smile: Allow yourself to be carefree and find humor in everything, even when you make mistakes.

  6. Take control: Being happy is about you. Learn how to find it within yourself, not through external validation.

  7. Share: Surround yourself with positive influences and people who share your joy.

Let yourself feel happy

Happiness is hard to find, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Everyone deserves to find happiness and cultivate a positive mindset that helps them enjoy the good and push through the bad. 

Start by identifying the things you love and finding ways to work through the things you don’t. It might take work to adjust your priorities, especially when life gets busy. But living a happier life is worth it — and your joy will influence the people around you, too.

Published May 23, 2023

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships.

With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

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