15 ways to manage workplace anger

In today's professional landscape, it's not uncommon to face moments of frustration or irritation at work. Whether it's a one-off occurrence or a recurring pattern, managing anger in the workplace is crucial for effectively expressing emotions and maintaining a positive work experience.

However, finding productive ways to handle workplace anger can be challenging. Frustrations can stem from various situations, from the vending machine malfunctioning to feeling triggered by your boss. 

But developing the ability to understand and process these emotions in difficult situations is not only beneficial for personal growth but also contributes to a more supportive and collaborative workplace.

Let’s dig into common causes of workplace anger, the importance of emotional regulation skills, and provide insights on how to deal with workplace anger effectively.

The effects of being chronically angry at work

The effects of anger in the workplace aren't limited to one's professional life. Anger can increase stress levels, both mentally and physically, and contribute to anxiety. It can cause physical health problems by elevating heart rate, increasing blood pressure, and impacting the immune and central nervous systems.

Constantly holding onto negative thoughts and emotions creates patterns of automatic thoughts that can harm self-esteem, self-confidence, and more.

Common causes of anger at work

You may feel angry at work for a variety of reasons––both work and non-work related. So it's important to explore the underlying causes to manage your emotions in the long run. 

Here are a few possible reasons why work may be making you angry:

• High levels of stress: Work-related stress can accumulate over time and lead to feelings of anger and frustration. Excessive workloads, tight deadlines, conflicts with colleagues, or a lack of work-life balance can contribute to heightened stress levels, making it more likely for anger to arise.
• Poor communication: Ineffective communication within the workplace can cause misunderstandings, conflicts, and a lack of clarity. When communication breaks down, it can lead to frustration and anger due to misaligned expectations, unaddressed concerns, or a sense of being undervalued or unheard.
• Lack of control or autonomy: Feeling like you have limited control over your work, decision-making processes or being micromanaged can generate feelings of anger and resentment. When you perceive a lack of autonomy or are constantly undermined in your role, it can erode your job satisfaction and trigger anger.
• Unfair treatment: Experiencing unfair treatment, such as favoritism, discrimination, or a lack of recognition for your efforts, can lead to anger at work. When you feel that your work is not valued or that others are receiving preferential treatment, it can be frustrating and demoralizing.
• Unfulfilled expectations: If your job fails to align with your expectations, career goals, or personal values, it can create dissatisfaction and fuel anger. Whether it's a lack of growth opportunities, a mismatch in job responsibilities, or feeling unappreciated, these factors can contribute to anger and a sense of being stuck.
• Organizational culture: A toxic work environment characterized by negative interpersonal dynamics, lack of support, or poor leadership can significantly impact your emotional well-being. Constant exposure to negativity, conflict, or a lack of trust can lead to chronic anger and a negative outlook on work.
• Personal factors: It's important to consider personal factors that might contribute to your anger at work. External stressors, unresolved personal issues, or difficulties in managing emotions can spill over into the workplace, making you more susceptible to anger triggers.

It's essential to identify the specific factors that contribute to your anger at work. Reflecting on these reasons can help you understand the root causes of your anger and find potential solutions. Depending on your situation, you may consider discussing your concerns with a trusted colleague, supervisor, or coach to address and manage these causes.

Using emotional intelligence to manage workplace anger

Now you might have an idea of where your frustrations stem from, but change does not happen overnight. Let’s look at some ways to manage your emotions in the meantime. So when these issues arise, you’re better equipped to handle them.

One way to achieve this control is by working on emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to process and communicate emotions in a positive and productive way. It also involves empathizing with others and understanding their emotions.

Instead of letting aggravation run wild in difficult situations, emotional intelligence steps in to help.

Emotional intelligence in the workplace is highly significant. Research has shown that emotional intelligence helps people make more informed decisions, strengthens teamwork, and aids in managing and coping with stress. It also guides and influences verbal and non-verbal actions, such as body language.

Emotional intelligence helps individuals communicate their feelings positively, even when experiencing negative emotions. It teaches them the importance of taking the time to process and understand how they feel before saying the first things that come to mind. It may prompt them to take a break, walk away, or stand up for themselves.

To better illustrate emotional intelligence in the workplace, here are seven examples of what it can look like:

1. Coworkers showing compassion toward each other when encountering setbacks or making mistakes.
2. Individuals being able to identify goals that will help them improve their skills due to self-awareness.
3. People spending their lunch breaks with others rather than isolating themselves.
4. Work-life balance and well-being are prioritized.
5. Management providing stress management resources and support.
6. People feeling comfortable expressing themselves and sharing creative ideas.
7. Conflict being resolved maturely and respectfully, without shouting or insulting others.

Strengthening emotional intelligence requires empathy, determination, and dedication, which is what BetterUp offers through its coaching program. Coaches provide the guidance and support needed to develop self-awareness and effectively express oneself at work.

15 ways to manage anger at work

Here are 15 effective ways to manage anger at work while developing emotional intelligence skills:

1. Take a deep breath

Deep breathing triggers the body's relaxation response by activating the parasympathetic nervous system. It slows down your heart rate, lowers blood pressure, and reduces muscle tension, promoting a sense of calm and helping you regain control over your emotions.

2. Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness involves paying deliberate attention to the present moment without judgment. It helps you become aware of your anger as it arises, observe your thoughts and emotions without reacting impulsively, and choose a more constructive response instead of being carried away by anger. Some mindfulness activities you can do at work include organizing your workspace, reminding yourself of your purpose at work, and practicing the Pomodoro technique.

3. Identify triggers

As mentioned earlier, understanding your anger triggers allows you to anticipate and prepare for situations that might provoke anger. By recognizing patterns and common triggers, you can develop strategies such as reframing perspectives, setting boundaries, or seeking support to manage or avoid triggering situations.

4. Use positive self-talk

Positive self-talk involves replacing negative and irrational thoughts with positive, rational, and self-affirming statements. By challenging negative beliefs and reframing your thoughts, you can shift your perspective, reduce anger intensity, and approach situations with a more balanced mindset.

5. Seek support

Sharing your feelings and concerns with a trusted colleague, supervisor, or friend can provide validation, different perspectives, and emotional support. It helps you gain insights into the situation, explore possible solutions, and feel less isolated in dealing with your anger.

6. Take a break

Stepping away from the source of anger allows you to disengage, cool down, and regain emotional balance. Physical movement, such as going for a walk, increases blood flow and releases endorphins, which can help alleviate stress and anger. Taking a break also provides a chance to gain perspective and approach the situation with a calmer mindset.

7. Practice active listening

Active listening involves fully focusing on the speaker, paying attention to verbal and non-verbal cues, and seeking to understand their perspective. By actively listening, you show respect, foster empathy, and create a conducive environment for constructive communication and conflict resolution.

8. Use assertive communication

Assertive communication involves expressing your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a clear, direct, and respectful manner. It helps you advocate for yourself, set boundaries, and address conflicts without resorting to aggressive or passive-aggressive behavior. By effectively communicating, you reduce misunderstandings and promote healthier relationships at work.

9. Practice empathy

Put yourself in the shoes of others and try to understand their perspective and feelings. Empathy helps you develop compassion and patience, enabling you to respond to challenging situations with more understanding and less anger.

10. Use humor (carefully)

Humor can defuse tense situations and help shift your perspective. It releases endorphins, reduces stress, and promotes a positive atmosphere. However, it's important to use humor tactfully and ensure it doesn't undermine the seriousness of the situation or offend others.

11. Set realistic expectations

Unrealistic expectations often lead to frustration and anger. Set realistic goals and timelines for yourself and others, considering the resources and constraints of the situation. This helps manage frustration and prevents feelings of being overwhelmed.

12. Practice problem-solving

Instead of dwelling on the problem, shift your focus to finding solutions. Break down complex issues into manageable steps, brainstorm alternative approaches, and consider the potential outcomes of each. Problem-solving directs your energy towards constructive actions, reducing anger and promoting productivity.

13. Seek professional help

If your anger at work becomes chronic or significantly impacts your well-being, seeking professional help, such as therapy or counseling, can provide valuable guidance and support. A professional can help you explore underlying causes, develop coping strategies, and address any deeper emotional issues contributing to your anger.

14. Practice self-care

Engage in activities that promote self-care and stress reduction. This can include regular exercise, maintaining a healthy work-life balance, getting sufficient sleep, practicing hobbies, and nurturing supportive relationships outside of work. Taking care of your physical and mental well-being helps build resilience and reduces the likelihood of anger triggers.

15. Reflect and learn from your experiences

After experiencing anger at work, reflect on the situation and your response. Assess what triggered your anger, how you reacted, and the outcomes. Reflecting on these experiences helps you learn from them, identify patterns, and develop strategies for future anger management.

You can better manage your anger at work

You don't have to relinquish all feelings of anger at work. In fact, that's not healthy or possible. Instead, you can learn how to express frustration at work healthily.

Being able to talk to your boss about mental health is difficult, but studies have shown that channeling your anger in a productive way allows you to think more creatively and better advocate for your needs. Advocating for yourself will improve your circumstances and help create a more positive work environment for your whole team. 

But if you're still wondering, "Is it OK to be angry at work?" the answer is yes. You have to express and feel your emotions. Sometimes you’re having a bad day because you’re tired and downright irritable. That’s normal. 

You can't view people as machines or be afraid to have feelings at work. Instead, work to understand that expressing your feelings will improve your well-being. 

Next time you're experiencing workplace anger, remember to acknowledge that what you're feeling is OK. But don't allow it to take away from you acting on your values and succeeding at your job.