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Feeling lost: signs, causes, and 4 tips for finding your way

February 5, 2024 - 13 min read

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What does it mean to feel lost?

7 tips for finding your way when you’re feeling lost

Focus on the journey: discovering what’s next

Everyone feels lost sometimes. 

Whether you’re in the midst of a major life transition or questioning a career pivot, feeling lost is a normal part of figuring out your next step. It’s often a sign of impending personal growth—an opportunity to accept new challenges and learn about yourself. 

It can be tricky to navigate making decisions while you’re feeling lost. Let’s take a closer look at what it’s like to feel lost and tips for taking your next step. 

What does it mean to feel lost?

Feeling lost is akin to feeling stagnant, in either your career or personal life. You recognize your current situation no longer serves you, but aren’t sure where to turn. For some individuals, it can feel similar to depression.

man-laying-on-table-with-head-down-depression

These are seven signs that you might be feeling lost:

  1. You often reflect on the past.

  2. You’re less optimistic about the future or questioning your life path.

  3. You struggle to enjoy activities that you used to love.

  4. You’re disinterested in how you’re spending time.

  5. You feel unmotivated.

  6. You feel like you’re in a rut.

  7. You feel as though you’ve lost touch with your true self.

For most of us, feeling lost is a sign our personal values or goals have changed. Perhaps your career aspirations have shifted, so your present role no longer feels fulfilling, or you’ve recently experienced a substantial shift in your personal life that has left you feeling aimless. 

Feeling directionless can be a catalyst to explore new opportunities and grow as an individual. Look at it as a chance to rediscover your purpose and set a new intention for how you live your daily life

Why do people feel lost?

Many different kinds of live events or experiences can prompt feeling lost. Here are some common reasons, but remember you can still feel lost without having experienced a life-changing event.

As we grow and evolve as people, our needs and goals change too. You may feel lost when your current life no longer aligns with your goals, values, or purpose.

7 tips for finding your way when you’re feeling lost

Feeling lost is nothing to panic about. 

It’s important to remember that overcoming the sense of feeling lost doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process of self-discovery filled with curiosity and patience

Picture yourself facing several doors, each one a new and exciting opportunity. You’re trying to determine which one to enter to bring more fulfillment to your life. 

Here are our top tips for finding your way when you feel lost. 

1. Identify your strengths

When you feel lost, you probably don’t spend much time reflecting on your strengths. This is exactly where you should start when setting out on your professional and personal development journey. 

man-with-hands-in-position-to-clap-personal-development

To help you get started, consider brainstorming the following questions:

  • Where do you excel in your current role at work? 

  • What are your favorite parts of your day?

  • What empowers you?

  • What skills have helped you thrive?

  • When are you the most productive?

Make sure to include both hard and soft skills. Do you have incredible project management skills and love to collaborate with colleagues? Are you the person your friends turn to when they need advice or support? Listing your strengths can both encourage you and guide your next steps. 

If you find it useful, it could be helpful to examine your weaknesses as well. What skills would you like to improve? Keep them in mind as you seek opportunities for growth.

2. Reflect on your values and goals

Our goals change as we do. It’s a normal and natural occurrence, but can understandably leave you feeling lost. Whether independently or with the support of a life coach, hold a magnifying glass up to your current goals. Ask yourself the following questions:

  • What are your current goals? Which of them still resonate with you, and which no longer excite you?

  • What do you care about right now? What passions, hobbies, and interests make you feel fulfilled?

  • What might it look like to incorporate these passions and interests into your daily life?

Pocket the answers to these questions. You can return to them for further reflection as you learn more about your passions. Look at your goals as things to reevaluate as you grow and change. 

3. Create new healthy habits

Take extra care to support your body and mind. It’s taxing on your well-being to navigate unchartered territory. Go out of your way to care for yourself. Here are some healthy self-care habits to try:

woman-silhouette-in-lotus-yoga-position-self-care

  • Journal. If you don’t know what to write about, look up prompts online to guide your writing. A journaling practice is a great way to challenge negative self-talk and rediscover topics that excite you. 

  • Exercise. Move your body every day. Even going for a 20-minute walk during your lunch break counts. 

  • Eat the rainbow. Make sure you’re eating three meals a day with some snacks sprinkled in. Incorporate more fruit and veggies, experiment with new recipes, and discover new foods you enjoy. 

  • Rest. Prioritize time for genuine rest. That could mean spending an afternoon watching movies or hiking—whatever true rest looks like to you. 

  • Meditation or deep breathing exercises. These habits help regulate your nervous system, so you can calm your mind and feel grounded in the present moment.

  • Minimize social media use. Young people spend an average of 3.5 hours a day scrolling on social media. Too much time spent “doom scrolling” negatively impacts self-esteem and can contribute to feeling lost. 

Use these healthy habits to build a solid routine. Eventually they will become automatic, and sustaining beneficial activities won’t require as much effort. They can also help you stay well-equipped to handle more challenging situations. 

4. Try new things—step outside of your comfort zone

Trying something new activates the parts of your brain that release dopamine, a “feel good” hormone that makes us feel pleasure and excitement. Engaging in a new activity or pursuing a new interest promotes feelings of well-being.

Trying new things also boosts our brain’s neuroplasticity, its ability to change and be rewired. By putting yourself in new situations, your brain forms new neural connections. Neuroplasticity happens in response to learning new things, and is associated with improved cognitive functioning over the long term. 

Harvard Medical School recommends finding new activities that are challenging and fairly complex. Make sure you set aside dedicated time to practice these new activities. 

5. Take steps toward your goals, no matter how small

While making huge changes all at once might feel like the most productive way to reach a new goal, it’s not the most sustainable. You learn more about yourself and your interests by gradually chipping away at your new goals. Slow, small steps are huge leaps in the long term. 

If you try approaching an objective one way and it doesn’t resonate, you can pivot and try another route. Use each step forward as a chance to better understand what to do next. 

6. Seek professional support

Feeling lost is a unique opportunity to set out on a new path. A professional coach or mentor can shed some light on what you should do next. Support like this can also help you handle complex emotions as they arise. 

Talk with someone you trust and who could view your situation from a new perspective. For example, if it’s time for a career change, seek the support of a career coach who can provide guidance.  

7. Be patient with yourself

How would you speak to a friend if they were in your position? Odds are, you would tell them to be kind to themselves, create space for rest, and appreciate the process of learning about their new goals. Treat yourself as you would a close friend—be kind and patient. 

When you find yourself feeling anxious or impatient, take a step back and look at the situation objectively. Focus on making progress instead of performing every step perfectly. Keep an open mind, so you’re enabled to learn as you go. 

Focus on the journey: discovering what’s next

Feeling lost is an opportunity to explore a new part of yourself and perhaps pursue a new goal. You shouldn’t expect immediate results. Instead, focus on learning from the journey that comes from finding your way.

Take care as you explore your next steps and remember: you’re not alone. Working with a coach can provide guidance on how to rediscover your values and goals. 

Visit BetterUp to learn more.

 

Published February 5, 2024

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships.

With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

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